Psycho Grammar Nazi is Back

Several weeks ago when I had my interview with SRA, the interviewer asked me what my grammar pet peeve is.

I couldn't think of one.

I must have just been out of practice, because they're all coming back to me now! I wanted to post the latest two, but when I thought about it, they can probably be lumped into one category: misusing pronouns (specifically, I, me, my, and myself).  

They are all personal pronouns, but each is a different type of pronoun. Listen carefully. Here are the rules:

• "I is a subjective pronoun. It should only be used as the subject of a sentence. (Subject = "doer" of the action) Ex: "I wanted to kick this editor today." or "Maureen and I are badass proofing machines."
• "Me" is an objective pronoun. It should only be used as the object of a sentence. (Object = receiver of the action) Ex: "She stuck me with a ridiculous deadline." or "Give the chapters to Maureen or to me."
• "My" is a possessive pronoun. It should be used to indicate possession or ownership. Ex: "Give me my red pen before I kick you."

Okay, now this is where it gets tricky…

• "Myself" is a reflexive pronoun. It should also be used as the object of a sentence, but ONLY when the subject (“doer” of the action) and the object (receiver of the action) refer to the same person. Ex: “I accidentally wrote on myself with my red pen.”

The two biggest violations of this rule (in my anal opinion) are as follows:

1. When someone uses “myself” when they should use “me.” Ex: “If you have a question, ask Suzie or myself.” No, no, no! It should be “…ask Suzie or me.” Another famous boo-boo is to say “…ask Suzie or I.” This is also wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
2. When someone uses “I” when they should use “my.” Ex: “The copies are on Jen and I’s desk.” Imagine nails on a chalkboard. Now you know how I feel. If you and Jen share the desk, it should be “The copies are on Jen’s and my desk.” Or, if that feels too weird for you, just say “my desk.” Screw Jen. Or, if you don’t want to screw Jen, say “our desk.” But if you say “Jen and I’s,” I will have to personally drive to your house and give you a Rudolph nose with my red pen. I mean it.

birthday pics

'Kay, sorry these are late, but here are the pictures from Friday.

My friends decorated by cube as a three-dimensional "blog," including a fake profile, fake entries, and fake comments. Goooood times. I [heart] my friends!

Happy Birthday to me :)

List of random things from my birthday yesterday:

• Craig singing a death-metal version of "Happy Birthday" to me first thing in the morning
• blogger cubicle (pictures to come)
• chimichanga with chicken ("I said beef, you jackass!" - what I wanted Justin to say to our waiter, but he didn't)
• saying goodbye to Teresa :(
• crying (sad) when I thought Craig had forgotten to get me anything
• crying again (happy) when he came home with flowers
• dinner at Molly Woo's (yummmmm)
• haunted "experience" = 2-hr wait in the freezing cold, crazy-fun game of Catchphrase (sort of), talking about "Lost" with fellow addicts, a 5-minute "lame" walk through the woods (that still scared the crap out of me)

Pictures to come. Thanks friends. It was a great one :)

Old Navy sucks

I hate Old Navy!

Don't ever sign up for their credit card. No matter how alluring the 10% off promise seems. It's not worth it. I officially hate them now.

tearing and mending

So I got a new CD last weekend. Bebo Norman. It's my first Bebo CD, and I like it so far. The lyrics aren't super deep, but I can relate to them.

This one came on last night while I was driving, and it struck a chord (somehow it missed the first few times I heard it). It describes how I feel so often...when I know something's not right inside, and I feel all bunched up and anxious about it, yet I'm not sure how to "fix" it. Usually the only way around it is through it--opening it up and dumping it out (usually in an unintelligible conversation with God, full of nonsense and tears). Somehow things seem clearer after that.

It reminds me of how my mom used to clean. She had a hard time cleaning just one little thing at a time, so when she decided to clean a room, she really cleaned it. Reorganized it from scratch. I mean, drawers were emptied, closets gutted, you name it. I'd walk into the room and it would look like a disaster zone--piles everywhere.

I'd be like, "Whoa, what's going on?"

She'd reply, "I'm cleaning."

"But," I'd protest, "it looks a lot worse than it did before you started...uh...cleaning."

Her response? "Sometimes, before you can clean a room, you have to make a bigger mess."

As a kid, I thought this was nutty. As an adult, however, I see a profound wisdom to this that maybe applies more to the mess of ourselves, the internal stuff, than it does to our spare rooms.

................................

Anyway. Lyrics. (half of them, anyway)

................................

The Way We Mend (Bebo Norman)

It's just that some voices remind me I'm not strong enough
To put all my demons behind me and carry this love
But just like an angel of mercy, You take me by the hand and say

It's the way we mend
We tear it all down and we'll start it again
And I don't know how but you find me where we begin
And that's just the way, the way that we mend

They're pouring out
From my mouth
So many words all spoken wrong
But you come alive
And somehow I find my way

"Until you find something worth dying for...

...you’re not really living.”

Embarrassing confession of the day: I’ve been listening to Rebecca St. James…and enjoying it!

An old song of hers came up on my iTunes this morning. The lyrics caught my attention and gave me kind of a fire inside. The song is about living beyond yourself…standing up for what you know is true, even if you face adversity because of it.

The lyrics allude to an event recorded in the Old Testament book of Daniel. Historical background: Jerusalem has been destroyed and the Jewish people are in exile in Babylon. Nebuchadnezzar is the Babylonian ruler, and he sets up this gold statue and commands the people to bow down and worship it (I think it might have been a gold statue of himself, but I’m not sure). Anyone who refuses will be thrown into a furnace and burned to death. Harsh dude! Anyway, there are these three Jewish guys who refuse to bow down to the statue because they don’t want to be disloyal to God by worshiping something other than him. So Nebuchadnezzar gets a little pissed (I think the guy had an ego problem) and tells them he’s going to throw them into the furnace; “Then what god will be able to rescue you from my hand?” (He had power issues, too)

Yikes! I’m not sure what I would have done in this situation. I’d probably be more than a little tempted to compromise my convictions once I could feel the heat of that furnace. But what do these three dudes say? I love this! They say, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."

Uh, dang. I want that kind of conviction. (Oh, and the ending of the story is really, really cool. If you’re curious, you can read about it in Daniel chapter 3.)

So anyway, I love the song and I love this story. There’s something so cool about living for something beyond yourself…living for a purpose that extends beyond our measly 70-some years on earth, working 9 to 5 and sleeping in on Saturdays. Our lives matter--each one of us--and we get to choose what we'll live them for. Who we'll serve.

What do you choose?

Thought I’d share the lyrics here.

"They laugh because they see
I live for more than me
They point their fingers,
Push me nearer to the flame
They say "We serve no one"
"We just live to please ourselves"
All men serve something…

Chorus:
Father, carry me high, lift me to the sky
Let me be where you are
Hold me, ever so closely, let me know your mercy
Let me be where you are

They can laugh, but let them see
You are the hope in me
They can point their fingers
Push me nearer to the flame
God, You can save me from the fire
I'm Yours, even if you don't
Whatever comes I take this vow
I will never bow…

Chorus

I will never bow…

Until you find something
Worth dying for
You're not really living

I will never bow…"

PostSecret

PostSecret card of the week:














It made me laugh. I love it when the secret is about someone having fun with life.

Feelin' Groovy

Okay, I need a distraction from work because I'm going crazy. I don't know what my problem is, but it is probably one or more of the following:

1. I've gotten used to a certain amount of downtime, so now that it's being eaten up, the busyness will take some getting used to.
2. I'm trying to learn a new job, while simultaneously retaining all the responsibilities associated with my current job, and it's hard to have my brain in two places at once.
3. I'm eager to move on from managing the TWE, so small TWE-related annoyances feel bigger than they usually would. In general, I'm feeling "done" with TWE. It's kind of like staying in a relationship after your heart isn't in it anymore. Every day feels a little more like torture.
4. People who don't know how to follow directions drive me crazy, and they seem plentiful on this project. In fact, it feels kind of like they're multiplying. Like rabbits. Little, blind, retarded, illiterate rabbits.

When I started typing this post, "Feelin' Groovy" came up on my iTunes. I found this amusing (since I'm feeling a little less than "groovy"), so I thought I'd post the lyrics.

(Sidenote: Although I think this song is about drugs, I am not condoning the use or distribution of any such drugs as a means of feeling groovy.)

The 59th St. Bridge Song (Feelin' Groovy)
-Simon & Garfunkel

Slow down, you move too fast
You got to make the moment last
Just kickin’ down the cobblestones
Lookin’ for fun and feelin’ groovy
La da da da da da da, feelin’ groovy

Hello lamppost, whatcha knowin’?
I come to watch your flowers growin’
Ain’tcha got no rhymes for me?
Do do do do, feelin’ groovy
La da da da da da da, feelin’ groovy

I got no deeds to do, no promises to keep
I’m dappled and drowsy and ready to sleep
Let the morning time drop all its petals on me
Life, I love you!
All is groovy...

Ba da da da da da da da da da
Ba da da da da da da da da da
Ba da da da da da da da da da

Free Music!

So Charlie Dodrill has four free downloadable songs on his MySpace profile. No strings attached. Check him out!

Enough Crypticness

Did you know that "crypticness" is actually a word? Well, it's not recognized by Webster yet, but the American Heritage Dictionary (which I used to own, until it was stolen from my dorm room [along with all of my textbooks] my freshman year when my roommate forgot to lock the door) vouches for it.

Anyway. I've been meaning to blog a followup post to clarify the recent enigmatic ones, but haven't gotten around to it until now.

Yes, the phone call I was waiting for (and finally got last week) was a job offer. An offer for a job I was convinced that I wanted...until, that is, I decided in my mind that, if they offered it to me, I was going to take it. Then, the doubts came. In floods. So many factors were weighing in (and weighing on me), but the bottom line is that the decision to take the offer (before, mind you, it was offered to me) was not sitting well with me. It didn't feel right. It was making me sick. Then, when the phone call finally came, I felt more unsure than ever.

I hate making decisions based on feelings. I'm a thinker, not a feeler. Right? So I like to believe, anyway.

I obsessed about it endlessly. Talked it over with friends. Talked it over with Jesus. Asked Him to make it clear. (It was so unclear!)

In the end, the decision was both emotional and rational. In the end, the right choice was clear.

I turned down the offer. I decided to stay.

So, even though I'm staying where I was/am, the process of...well, processing through the decision has helped clarify many things for me. What's important to me in a job. What I want to do. Who I want to do it with. (Okay, that sounded bad, but you know what I mean) Where I see myself going and who I want to become. So, even though I'm staying in the same place, I don't feel like I'm staying in the same place. Most importantly, I want to resurrect the Grammar Nazi. I've missed her.